There are certain moments in life that only make sense when you look back at them years later.

At the time, they often just feel uncomfortable. Daunting. Completely outside your comfort zone.

In July this year, it will be ten years since I travelled to Barcelona for a leadership programme called Future Leaders, organised by ukactive and delivered at IESE Business School, one of the world’s leading business schools.

Looking back now, I can see that those four days quietly changed the direction of my life.

At the time though, all I knew was that I was terrified.

The funny thing is, when people talk about journeys, they often imagine confidence, excitement and independence. But this journey started with me asking my little sister if she could come with me because I was too nervous to travel abroad on my own.

For context, I was 40 years old and, incredibly, I had never travelled anywhere by myself before.

Even though the trip was work related, the thought of navigating airports, travelling internationally and spending several days in an unfamiliar environment felt enormous to me. We had to contact the hotel to ask if Lauren could stay too, even though the accommodation was intended for programme delegates (and I had to ‘hide’ her from everyone so as to not completely discredit myself with my newly formed co-hort). Thankfully, everything was sorted and off we went to Barcelona.

I still remember arriving at the stunning IESE campus and immediately feeling aware that I had stepped into a completely different environment. The programme was intense from the very beginning. Long days in lecture halls, case studies, strategic discussions, reading and preparation each evening before starting all over again the next morning. I was intimidated!

But one part of the programme was making me anxious above everything else.